The Why

When heartache becomes inspiration and a brand is born.  This is Invisibaby™️.

 

Mission Statement:

To acknowledge and empower mothers who lost babies during pregnancy or shortly after birth and honor the the tiny lives that live on in our hearts.  To provide resources and support to loss mothers and work toward creating an environment that is positively receptive to our stories.

 

My story:

I lost a pregnancy three years in the making.  It’s hard to put into words what I felt losing my baby.  I cried.  A lot.  I developed insane anxiety that put me in the hospital a couple times.  I lost sight of what the purpose of life was without raising a child.  I found myself in dark places a few times that really scared me.  I took some pretty heavy psychiatric drugs to break the cycle I was in so I could focus on healing.

I didn’t have any resources on how to grieve.  I had a D&C in the hospital and was sent home with nothing but a pamphlet with quotes from other mothers who miscarried.  Family and friends were supportive, but my own husband coudln’t even understand my pain (his tears were for my agony and not the loss of our son).  Finally, after an overnight in the ER, a new psychiatrist informed me about a local organization that has regular meetings for mothers who experienced pregnancy or infant loss.  I went to my first meeting two months after my miscarriage and only then did I start to find my path through grief to healing.

A lot of what helped me heal was memorializing by baby.  I gave him a name, JB for Jelly Bean.  I created a frame for his sonogram.  I made a flag for him at one of the support meetings.  I started to share about him openly, and through sharing, found out about other friends who have lost babies through miscarriage or stillbirth.

There is a stigma about pregnancy and infant loss and I believe it stems from people not knowing what to say or how to offer comfort.  It can lead to some awkward interactions, but I think we can change that.  People are starting to come out more about pregnancy loss and this is such a healthy movement for society.

Grieving in secret makes the grief worse.  It adds a sense of shame.  But if we start to share and help others understand what we feel and how they can provide support, we may create an environment that welcomes grieving mothers and acknowledges the babies they lost.

My goal is to empower mothers like us to share openly about the babies we lost and celebrate their lives and our unique motherhood.